The Obituary Conversation

IMG_1980

Ever notice that the most important points in your life are placed inside of your obituary?

Your obituary will include family, the things you loved, and the things which made you happy.
Your obituary will include the things which are really important.

Your career and accomplishments won’t even take up a paragraph.

No initial conversation, other than a job interview, should lead with anything less than something obituary worthy.

I’m over the conversations with men who wish to run down their resumes and accomplishments within minutes of meeting.

I don’t care about all that fluff.

I only want meaty, obituary worthy conversations with a person who has been through something and has worked towards a life, not towards a resume.

Please just have an exciting obituary!

Your obituary doesn’t care about your job and what you did in college and neither do I, or anyone who is really trying to get to know you.

Please have some depth and don’t let what you do define you. Only let you define you. This is what matters.

Random Rant: Pretty Girls Get Violent

Shooting someone in the leg because you’re angry should be legal. I had a “shoot someone in the leg” type of day.

I can’t see myself killing anyone but I can see myself shooting them in the leg.

A family member of mine (R.I.P) has done it to someone before and her reasoning for it was, “for every time they limp, they will think of me and what they did.”

With my level of crazy this sounds completely rational and the perfect reason to shoot with no intention to kill.

I wish I could do this and get away with it like she did, but for now I will just use my imagination.

(Back to regularly scheduled programming)

Empire Premiere

2015/01/img_1962.jpg

This looks like it’s going to be a goodie!!! I will admit that I am a jinx when it comes to network television dramas. Every time I start to watch one from the very beginning of the season they get cancelled. I pray to gawd that this isn’t the case with Empire.
Continue reading

Random Rant

Go on girl!
Post that back shot.
Then post that picture of the food you made, and then a picture of you going to work.
You better let them know you a good woman!

Go ‘head boy!
You better post that picture of you with your son, followed by a quote about how to treat a woman, followed by a picture of you also at work.
Women love baby fathers with jobs!

The Guide to Keeping Your Friends and Your Man

Photo credit: eclipsusa.com

Photo credit: eclipsusa.com

It’s time for a sister to sister moment. Come here.

Since high school I have noticed that some women really have a hard time balancing being in a relationship and holding friendships at the same time.

Now to help all of my confused newly chosen women, I decided to make a guide to make your dating life and your social life life a lot easier to balance. Please realize that your friends are not going to be around all of the time and neither will your boo so take notes and learn a thing or two.

Besides, you will need a shoulder to cry on when he fucks up, because he will, and you will also always need your boyfriend to be your number one homie because your girlfriends are flakes. Continue reading