Brotherf*cker

i-love-my-best-friend_designLets address something. I’ve been hearing many people throw around the terms sister, brother, and twin, as greetings for a while now and I am down right perplexed. I am confused because when I hear these terms used I am always expecting to see a relative pop up from out of the shadows or someone who at least looks similar, but I am wrong EVERY TIME. Nowadays is seems that when people actually use these words they are referring to some  random ass “friend”, who is not related to them.

I am so confused. tumblr_lgshoaFabH1qd1aayIf you’re not related to someone why call them a relative name? Who calls their relatives brother, sister or twin anyway?

Let’s think about it…Have you ever really yelled “brother” to your actual related brother? If you have then you are weird as fuck, because I’m very sure that at this point in time you guys are well aware that you are siblings, so there is no need to clarify. If using a family member’s title sounds stupid when used to address someone you’re actually related to, imagine how stupid you sound using it with the random friend you just made, or even worse, with someone you’re fucking.

You kids and how you talk are really losing me and making me feel old as hell. 5653839761_get_off_my_lawn_xlargeHelp me understand because I don’t believe in yelling “Sis” to the bitch that I just met 6 months ago and yelling “Bro” to someone who probably wants to fuck me, or to someone I have already fucked.

Out of all these proclamations of fake family I’m probably the most lost on calling someone “Twin.” Don’t we have to look alike or share the same womb to be called twins? What happened in life to have all of these fake twins walking around?

What qualifies someone as a twin? Is it weave length? Does having kids the same age make you twins? Is it being the same level of basic? Does sharing the same dick make you twins? Are these all factors of “twinning”?

But then females use this term for the males they’re “not” fucking too so...

Someone, please educate me on how being fake related makes a friendship any stronger or covers up when a man and woman are fucking. I need answers.

Photo credit: sodahead.com

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